Travel with Me: what I learned about myself when traveling without kids
Updated: Jul 10, 2022
The long-awaited part 4 of my St. Lucia series is finally here! I know I promised a 5-consecutive-day series but that goal was #unrealistic. As a mom of 2 littles, juggling life and grad school, our days can get real crazy. But we are back! Today I am sharing big reflections I made during our trip. Stay tuned until the end to hear all the changes coming to The Meck House.
I am going to start with how excited I was to go on this trip. St. Lucia has been a dream of mine for years. Fun fact, this was my dream honeymoon location back in 2014 when Carl and I tied the knot. Unfortunately, we were two broke kids & couldn't afford it along with the cost of our wedding. We did a low-key weekend cabin getaway that was perfect, but St. Lucia has continued to live rent-free in my mind for the past 8 years.
Needless to say, when Carl booked us a couples trip to the Sandals Halcyon I was 1,000% on board. How did it go and what did I learn? Well, it wasn't all sunshine and happiness. I had a lot of time to reflect on the life we are living, and Carl and I had time to talk. I know, amazing 😂.
The first day we arrived at the Sandals resort I was a total wreck. I was exhausted from the overnight airport layover. Running on minutes of sleep in 24 hours, my head hit the pillow and I crashed. A few hours later I awoke an emotional mess. I was tired, hungry (I get real hangry mommas), and I missed my babies. I kid you not I SOBBED. I was in tears the first night and the first full day.
What I didn't realize when we left for St. Lucia was that I hadn't left my babies for more than a night since the pandemic hit in 2020. Throughout Bubba's entire life I had never left him for more than a weekend trip. I truly felt like my heart was ripped from my chest and left behind with the kids.
As time passed things did get easier. By the third day, I still missed the kids but was enjoying myself. I read, relaxed on the beach, had poolside drinks, and full uninterrupted conversations with my husband. It was refreshing. I am no relationship therapist, but I recommend taking a no-kids trip with your spouse. It allows for connecting that we don't have time for when we are home.
Getting to the point here, I learned a lot about myself during this vacation. Because I was a teacher for 5 years and am a type-A momma, I created a list for you all to view. 😉
I love my kids. I mean LOVE them. Like they are a literal piece of my soul. Being so far away from them for so long is NOT something I want to do again. At least for now. Hear me out, as mentioned before I did have fun on my trip. We just both realized that we don't want to miss anything with the kids right now. They are at an amazing age, 5 & 3, and every moment is fleeting. We agreed that while we love taking couples' vacations, we will only do weekend trips close to home for the time being.
My self-care has been lacking for far too long. I have been working on this for a while. I am currently enrolled in a grad program for school counseling and this topic has been a headliner since July. Having this much time to myself, I was able to reflect on what I am doing well and what I need to improve on. I know that I should be giving myself alone time during the day (yes every day), if I want to stay mentally fit. The constant "mom, mom, mommy!", can be a lot when you are hearing it every moment of the day.
Here is the big one. I want more children! This was a HUGE revelation for me. Carl has wanted a third baby for a while, but I have always said no. Full disclosure, he was even offering to get a vasectomy to make me happy. I think I have just been stretched so thin for so long that I couldn't possibly see how I could handle more. With Bubba, I suffered from Post-Partum and it took me a long time to get back to myself. I was (and honestly still am) scared of this happening again. If you have ever lost yourself I know you will understand.
How did all of these realizations occur? This trip gave me time to take care of myself. I was able to see the room in my heart and feel excited about life again. So there it is friends. We are officially trying to have a third baby. The journey is just beginning here at The Meck House. I hope you all will continue to follow me on my journey through #motherhood. I will be sharing updates on this big step as I can do so.
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💕💕sending you love & momma to momma support,